Hello? Is your refrigerator running?

A collection of not-all-that-funny phone gags is here. Check it out if you want, but the only one I really thought was great was this one:


Every now and then we are all pestered by these high-tech telemarketing companies where the sales pitch is usually disguised as a survey of some kind. The despicable thing about these things is that they won't leave you alone. If you hang up, they will just call back again.



One day my wife got a call from one of these computer systems, and her answering machine answered. The conversation that followed was hilarious, as it consisted of two machines talking to each other without having the slightest idea about what each other was saying. The conversation wound up in an endless loop, as follows:



[PHONE] *RING*



[ANSWERING MACHINE] "...At the tone, please give your message.
BEEEEEP."



[PHONE] "Hello. This is [company_name], and we are taking a telephone survey ... when I ask a question, wait for the beep, then please speak plainly. I will repeat your answer back to you, and verify it. First, what is your phone number? BEEEEEEEEEEEEEP."



(The answering machine, upon hearing the beep, got confused and thought it was a play-back command, and generated another beep in response.)



[ANSWERING MACHINE] "BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP."



[PHONE] "Thank you! Your phone number was 443-28347-47756-377764-22222.
Is that correct? BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP."



[ANSWERING MACHINE] "BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP."




[PHONE] "Thank you! Do you have any children? BEEEEEEEEEEEEEP."



[ANSWERING MACHINE] "BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP."



[PHONE] Thank you! What is the age of your first child? BEEEEEEEEEEP."



[ANSWERING MACHINE] "BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP."



[PHONE] "Your first child is 1,222 years old. Is that correct?
BEEEEEP."



[ANSWERING MACHINE] "BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP."



[--------------- BEGIN ENDLESS LOOP ----------------]



[PHONE] "Thank you! Do you have any more children? BEEEEEEP."




[ANSWERING MACHINE] "BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP."



[PHONE] "Thank you! What is this child's age? BEEEP."



[ANSWERING MACHINE] "BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP."



[PHONE] "This child is 4,233 years old. Is that correct? BEEEEP."



[ANSWERING MACHINE] "BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP."



[---------------------END LOOP -----------------------]



My wife, upon noticing that the answering machine had been going for over half an hour, turned up the volume to find out what was going on. When she discovered this endless loop (by now she had over 200 children, all over 1,000 years old), she switched off the answering machine. The computer never called again.