Thursday, January 07, 2010

The Boy Who Cried "Pillow!": A Fable in One Act

15 Really Unusual Pillows

Made from urethane foam, this Japanese pillow imitates a woman's legs, so you can sleep on her lap.

Sure, the Pool of Blood pillow is a laff-riot and all, until the one time you slip and crack your melon. To wit:

Guy #1: "Ha! Hey look, there's Henderson taking a nap again with his wacky puddle of blood pillow!"

Guy #2: "Yeah, he really got me good the first time I saw him sleeping on that. I mean I really freaked! I had dialed 9 and 1 and had my finger on the 1 again when I noticed it was just a fuzzy facsimile of a hemorrhaging head! That guy! What a nut!"

[to the prone Henderson] "You won't fool me this time, Henderson!

Guy #1: "Yeah, you're gonna have to do better than that, H-man!"

Guy #2: "Wonder where he got that crazy pillow anyway? And how does he get it to keep expanding like the pool of blood is getting bigger and bigger?"

Guy #1: "Yeah, that is cool."

[to the still motionless Henderson] "That is one tricked out pillow, H-monster!"

Guy #2: "Someone really should tell him that it isn't safe to snooze out here on this icy sidewalk."

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