Monday, July 07, 2003

Get off my back!

"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I'm just a caveman. I fell on some ice and later got thawed out by some of your scientists.

Your world frightens and confuses me! Sometimes the honking horns of your traffic make me want to get out of my BMW.. and run off into the hills, or wherever..

Sometimes when I get a message on my fax machine, I wonder: 'Did little demons get inside and type it?' I don't know! My primitive mind can't grasp these concepts. But there is one thing I do know - when a man like my client slips and falls on a sidewalk in front of a public library, then he is entitled to no less than two million in compensatory damages, and two million in punitive damages. Thank you."

Phil Hartman as The Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer - Saturday Night Live

Excerpts from Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer's Day Planner:

1. Remember to download cool new game

2. Pick up a movie or two from Blockbuster

3! IMPORTANT! Find wife, then enter contest.

(thanks to Lou "Cave Goddess" Campbell)

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